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About Newcastle

Y’know, in Amsterdam, they got windows—red lights, girls posin’. Legal, even! Blew my mind, precious, seein’ ‘em strut like queens. Not skulkin’ like us hobbitses. Made me happy, sorta—freedom’s nice, ain’t it? But here? Pfft, coppers nab ya quick—sneaky bastards! Once saw a bloke hagglin’, voice all shaky— “This ain’t no ranch!” I yells in my head, snortin’.

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Then, I bump into this old fella named Bertie. He’s a local legend, I swear. He starts tellin’ me stories about the town. Like, did you know Donaghadee used to be a major port? Crazy, right? He’s got this twinkle in his eye, and I’m just noddin’ along, lovin’ the vibe. But then he goes off on a rant about how the youth don’t appreciate the history. I’m like, “Chill, Bertie, we’re tryin’ our best!”

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