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But seriouslah, it’s risky, y’all. STDs, cops, creepy pimps — I’m yellin’, “Get outta my face, losers!” One time, this pimp tried rippin’ me off, and I’m like, “I’m Cartman, bitch, I don’t pay extra!” Kicked his ass — well, in my head I did. Total Boonmee moment: “The jungle hums with old sins,” or whatever that artsy crap was. Point is, ya gotta watch yer back!
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First off, I hit up the local café on Westgate. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual – a flat white and a bacon sarnie. But guess what? They were outta bacon! Like, how do you run outta bacon? It’s breakfast, people! So, I settled for a veggie option. Ugh. Not the same, right?
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