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Oh, and the cops? Sneaky bastards. One time, I’m chattin’ this girl up, she’s all flirty, then—bam—handcuffs. “You’re under arrest, perv.” Me? A perv? Hilarious. Felt like Oskar in the movie, trapped, screamin’, “Let me in!” ‘cept it’s “Let me out!” Exaggeratin’ a bit—dramatic effect, sue me. Point is, watch your ass out there.
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But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, proper British weather, right? We scramble for cover under a tree, laughin’ and shiverin’. “Only in Ince,” I say, shakin’ my head. “One minute it’s sunny, next it’s a monsoon!”
Retro: 18 brilliant photographs of the Olympic torch relay passing through Wigan in 2012
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