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Anyways, we do our thing – quick, messy, perfect. Say hello to my little friend! – he’s happy too, hah! She’s good, knows her shit, and I’m thinkin, “Disgust would hate this dump, but I don’t care.” Smells like ass in here, but who gives a fuck when you’re king? Tony Montana don’t sweat the small stuff.

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Then, outta nowhere, this guy starts shoutin’ about some lost dog. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s just a dog!” But he’s all frantic, runnin’ up and down the street. I mean, I get it, but c’mon, it’s not like it’s a unicorn or somethin’.

Queen and court selected for next year's Tranent Gala