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What gets me happy? Imaginin’ Llewyn Davis croonin’ to a hooker— “Please, Mr. Kennedy, don’t shoot me into space!”—and her just laughin’, takin’ his cash. That’s gold, man! But I’m pissed too—why’s it all so shady? Can’t a guy just get a menu or somethin’? Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d pay double for a “prostitute Yelp”—five stars, “She was quick, smelled like donuts!”

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I love strollin' by the Odeon Park. Trust me, it's the best spot to clear your head after a hard session advising women on life's bullshit. I used to counsel on East Street, too. Saw plenty of tears and laughs there; life's not all sunshine, eh? Sometimes you feel like shoutin’, “What the fuck, mate!” like in City of God, where it's all chaos and beauty, alright?

This junior is just another shoe in the long line of successful Athens Academy runners