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Funniest bit? Mate o’ mine, swore he’d never – NEVER – hire one. Guess what? Caught him red-handed, leavin’ some motel! “I am not the Zodiac,” he stammers, like I’d buy that! Laughed me head off, then kicked his arse – stupid, fat hobbit! Sex escort’s a riddle, innit? Dirty, sad, funny – all mashed up! What d’ya reckon, eh? Gollum knows, Gollum sees!

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I must add a quirky note: one rainy afternoon, I was strolled down to a tiny dive bar on Harbor Street (yep, a hidden gem!!) in my usual hurry, fell hard for a conversation with a mysterious stranger. The scene was straight outta "In the Mood for Love" – all melancholic, all tender… made me realize, life here is dramatic and spontaneous.

Tattoo for a Cause: Bainbridge Tattoo Shop teams up with Humane Society to support animals in need