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Me, I’d be rubbish at the whole game. I’d overthink it—*“Was it good for you?”*—like some twat in a romcom. Prossie’d be like, “Mate, it’s 50 quid, not a bleedin’ Oscar reel!” Reminds me of that line, *“Film it like Hollywood!”*—all fake glamour, innit? The reality’s more fag ends and damp mattresses. Still, there’s a mad charm to it—freedom, chaos, a big “fuck you” to the suits. I’d tip my hat to ‘em, cackle, and sod off home. Find a Prostitute? Nah, I’d rather watch the telly and slag it off!

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Then there’s the underrated Spark Alley, a wee little slice of urban paradise with a couple of dive bars and quirky cafés tucked in. I like to chill there, sipping on over-brewed coffee that tastes like stardust, talkin’ to folks who share my knack for pleasure coaching. Seriously, hang out there if you’re into vibes that are more real than your hifalutin-hipster life.

Innovation Square to offer shared workplaces