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About Philadelphia

So, picture this—ya need a hookup, quick! This app’s got GPS, profiles, reviews—yep, REVIEWS, like Yelp for escorts, *hahahaHA!*—I’m cacklin’ already! I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my cosmo, thinkin’, “How’d this not exist yet?” Little known fact, babe—back in the ‘90s, pimps used pagers, legit! Now we’re all high-tech, swipin’ for a good time. I’m HAPPY, like, finally, somethin’ useful!

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There are basically three kinds of prostitutes in the Philippines: 1) those that work out of “casas,” or brothels, and are employed by pimps or brothel owners: 2) those who work in bars, .

For real, living here feels like being part of an epic documentary. Each neighborhood, each park, has its own tale, its own rhythm. Times I get all nostalgic thinking about some random alleyway near Central Brea, i get all mushy. Like Attenborough narrating the secret lives of ants, i see love blossoming in every cranny. Every moment’s real, raw, and here’s the kicker—they remind me of life’s fragility and joy, as our fave movie reminds us in its subtle, profound way.

Randall Mitchell concedes La Brea seat after general election