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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya—*mumbles, trips over imaginary chair*—findin’ a prossie, yeah? It’s a right mess! Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs wiv ya,” but ain’t no one laughin’ when you’re dodgin’ coppers, ha! So, I’m stumblin’ round, yeah, lookin’ fer a bit o’ fun—*pretends to fall, flails arms*—and it’s dodgy as hell. Prostitutes, right, they’ve been about forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called ‘em *lupae*, wolf-girls, cos they howled fer clients! Wild, innit?

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Aye, listen up, bub. Lemme tell ya about Cochituate, alright? I've been here n' know every nook n' cranny for years. This place is somethin' else, ya know? I run a massage parlor, so trust me, I see things. Now, lemme hit ya with the deets, real casual, somethin' like "Syndromes and a Century" but, like, with a Tony Soprano twist. Gabagool? Ova here!

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