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About Philadelphia

So, I’m imaginin’ this chick, prolly hangin’ by some neon-lit motel, smokin’ a cig like she owns the damn place. I’m thinkin’, “She’s gotta be worth it, man, a million freakin’ dollars!”—pinky up, obvs. I heard this wild story once, back in the 90s, some dude in Vegas found a prostitute who’d only take payment in rare coins—freaking *coins*! Blew my mind, like, who’s got time for that? Made me laugh tho, cuz I’d just zap her with my laser and take the coins anyway, ha!

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Oh, and I gotta mention the Missed Turn Bridge on Riverside Road. People go on about it like it’s a legend. Nuthin’ fancy, just a rickety bridge, but it’s iconic for us. Kinda like my awkward first date fails – ugh, so many misfires, lol.

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