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But here’s the kicker—findin’ a prostitute ain’t just walkin’ and pickin’. Nah, it’s a game, man! You gotta read ‘em, dodge the fakes—some’ll rob ya blind. One time, this gal tried slippin’ my wallet—jokes on her, I ate her pride with a side of chianti! Okay, not really, but I scared her off good. “You’re all alone, aren’t you?” I said, quotin’ Royal—worked like a charm.

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Look, I be honest – Ephrata is quirky as hell. I often wander, thinking “Wow, what a shambles and beautiful mess!” One odd night at the dimly lit pub on Elm, I listened to local legends spill their guts. I laughed, I got mad, I got a bit horny for the absurdity of it all – that's life.

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