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About New York City

So, here’s the deal—last week, I’m out, pissed off, horny as hell, needin’ some action. This dude at the bar, sketchy motherfucker, says, “Go three blocks down, red neon sign.” I’m like, cool, sounds legit, right? WRONG! Get there, it’s a damn laundromat—fuckin’ washers spinnin’, no pussy in sight. I’m yellin’, “Motherfucker, who’s playin’ me?!” People stare, I don’t give a shit. That’s when I learned—never trust a drunk tip, ever.

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Man, my job lets me notice all the tiny deets. The tension in people’s shoulders on 3rd Ave? I can read ‘em like a book, dude! That’s why I sneer during busy days. It messes with my zen sometimes, but it’s cool, I guess. And hey, sometimes I loosen up with a good ol’ massage session in the secret zen garden off Willow Ct. – my fav spot!

Students evacuated after Finderne truck accident