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Hmm… oh honey, listen up! So, findin’ a prostitute—wild stuff, right? I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my burnt coffee, thinkin’—jeez, it’s like *The Wolf of Wall Street* out there! You know, “I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!”—that’s me, stuck on this topic. I mean, where do ya even start? Back in Springfield, I’d be all naggy, “Homer, don’t you dare!” But real talk—people been doin’ this forever. Like, did ya know, in old Rome, they had brothels with menus? Freakin’ menus! Pick yer girl like she’s a donut—crazy, huh?

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So yeah, my dear friend, Greenburgh’s a bit messy, a bit harsh, but damn, it’s real! You’ll laugh, you'll cry, you'll get lost – but you'll see a bit of your own story in its alleys and parks. Just holler if you need a guide – me, your trusty counslor, always ready to natter down the roads of our twisted, beautiful Greenburgh, yesss, precious!

Valhalla man indicted on animal cruelty charges in connection to death of dog in Greenburgh