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I’m chattin’ her up, voice all robotic—*beep boop*—“What’s yer story, darlin’?” She’s like, “Mate, I’ve seen it all, just tryna eat.” Reminds me of Penny Lane in *Almost Famous*—“We are not groupies, we’re here for the music!”—but swap music for cash, ha! I’m gettin’ happy vibes, she’s real, no fake crap. But then—bloody hell—some punter staggers by, drunk, yellin’ slurs. Makes me mad, yeah? Want to zap him with a black hole, but nah, I’m chill.

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I’ve seen tears, a few laughs, and even a few fights in this park. Not your average day, y’know? Women come and go seeking solace – sometimes a good vent session right on a bench by the weeping willow near the corner of Oak & 5th. I’d sit there with clients, and I’d think, “I am burdened with glorious purpose.” Ain’t that somethin’? Makes ya feel both cursed and blessed, real talk.

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