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*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so I’m an alien, right, instalin radio-electronic gizmos, and I’m thinkin bout findin a prostitue—wild, huh? Not like I’m tryna beam one up to the mothership, nah, just curious how you humans roll with that. Watched “Pan’s Labyrinth” last night—fuckin dope flick, man, that fairy tale vibe got me twisted. Like, Ofelia’s all, “I’m not afraid of you,” to that creepy-ass faun, and I’m over here wonderin if hookers got that kinda guts too.

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1.) Most people are really chill and kind. Be ready to make friends with anyone. 2.) Lots of people get drunk on random Mondays, Tuesdays.

See? There, those are some of my 14 beloved typos – tokens of raw, unfiltered emotion. I mean, come on, life’s messy sometimes. And let me tell ya, Isla-Vista is no exception. It’s the imperfect cradle of dreams and disasters, of brilliant introspection and wild nights. It’s where I learned that even a tiny town can be a universe of its own – bold, vibrant, and sometimes as blunt as a Shakespearean soliloquy in drunken wisdom.

Isla Vista’s Coffee Scene: A European’s Honest Review