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Oi, mateys, gather 'round, savvy? Me, Cap’n Jack Sparrow, been thinkin’ ‘bout somethin’ dark n’ twisted—like me mind after a rum binge. Findin’ a prostitute, aye? Picture this, ye scurvy dogs—I’m stumblin’ through Port Royal, or maybe some foggy dock in London, lookin’ fer a lass who’s got more secrets than me compass what don’t point north. “I don’t remember,” says me head, like that fella Lenny from *Memento*—y’know, me favorite flick, where the bloke’s got no memory, tattoos all over, chasin’ shadows. “Who am I?” he scribbles. Me? I’m chasin’ a skirt what trades love fer gold, savvy?

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I also gotta mention, our dear dating site often stumbles upon quirky hotspots. People talk about the reminiscing bench on Pineapple Street – nah, not really fruit, but a bench where old lovers meet, go boom! Like a line from that blasted movie: "This is a war zone!" Aye, yesss, always danger around each corner.

Storms leave Lago Vista marina with ‘severe damage’