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About Phoenix

Alright, so I’m Dr. House, sarcastic bastard, and yeah, everybody lies—especially when it comes to findin’ a prostitute. You think people are honest about that? Ha! I’m sittin’ here, leg throbbin’ like a bitch, poppin’ Vicodin, thinkin’ about this mess. Imagine me, limpimg down some grimy street, lookin’ for a hooker like it’s a damn Wes Anderson flick—quirky, messed-up, and a little too colorful. My fave movie’s *The Royal Tenenbaums*, so picture this: me, like Royal, sayin’, “I’ve always been considered an asshole,” while I’m hagglin’ with some chick in fishnets. Classic.

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First, Main St. buzzes ceasely. It’s where locals gather, you know? Mmm, that area near Elm & 5th. I recall a juicy secret—an ancient fountain there. Wow! Feeling zen, I was. Hmmm… And, oh, Southside's quirky vibe—a blend of art, mmm, music, and spicy street food. Crazy, right? People jostling through the colored graffiti alleys near Riverbend Park—ah, man, so lively!

Around Town: Laguna Playhouse to stage August Wilson’s ‘Fences’