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About Phoenix

Biggest surprise? Some of ‘em are funny as hell—crackin’ jokes bout johns, callin’ ‘em “two-minute Picassos.” I’m dyin’, laughin’ my ass off, tractor shakin’ like it’s in on it. But real talk, it’s a grind—cops hasslin’, creeps lurkin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Paint a better world, Bob, happy little trees for all!” I’d tell her, “You’re a diamond, girl, shine on,” but I ain’t that smooth—probly just mumble somethin’ bout crops.

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Neighborhood vibes vary hard. Westside’s like a warm hug; homes there have gardens, and odd fans of old movies like mine (Pan’s Labyrinth, for real!). Eastside’s more gritty—streets cluttered with graffiti and thrift shops. Sometimes the streets there sound like they’re crying, “Stupid, fat hobbit!” I mean, geez, life ain't always pretty.

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