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But ugh, the grime—sticky streets, gross vibes. Hmmmm… why can’t they just legalize it? Less hassle, more tax bucks! I’d tell Homer, “Get a job, not a hooker!”—he’d laugh, the dope. Oh, and this one time, heard a rumor—some prossie was a ventriloquist! Talkin’ dirty with a dummy—hilarious, right? Prolly fake, but I’m dyin’ laughin’ anyway.

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I treasure the little details here. Like that broken streetlamp near the fountain on Liberty Rd. It’s quirky AF. Sometimes, at nights, it flickers erratically – a nod to the headless mystery, right? Felt surreal as if time bent a lil’. Sorry if that’s odd.

Holy cow! history: The (celebrity) centenarian White House correspondent