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What’s funny? These saps payin’ double for “classy” when the street’s got gems. Sarcasm alert—oh yeah, pal, she’s a *real* lady, sippin’ champagne in stilettos. Ha! Me, I’m bargain huntin’—not ‘cause I’m broke, ‘cause I’m smart. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but picture this—me, cigar in hand, hagglin’ like it’s a stock trade. “Drainage, drainage!”—I’m drainin’ their rates dry.

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Sometimes I wander the narrow streets of Haleiwa Crescent (yep, that one!). It's lived-in. Walls display colors of sun and sea. I swear it got me mad when tourists think they can just snap pics without feelin the pulse of the city. But it's all good, 'cause those alleys speak to me, remind me to slow down. They give off a certain elegance—like the haunting lull of a story fraught with both desire and pain.

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