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I spot this bird – legs like a highway, skirt shorter than my temper. “You lookin’ for a good time?” she goes, and I’m like, “Fuck yeah, darlin’!” Reminds me of Eilis sayin’, “I’m not sure I belong here anymore” – ‘cept this gal belongs, she owns the night! I’m half-pissed, laughin’, thinkin’ – mate, this is cheaper than therapy! Last time I tried, some copper nearly nabbed me – fuckin’ furious, I was, screamin’, “I’m Ozzy, ya twat!” – but this time? Smooth as a bat’s arse.

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Blergh, exzactly, man! I luv the chaotic vibes and its bittersweet charm, like those soft, whispered Carol lines: "I’m just a little scared, but in a good way." It’s beauty, madness, and surprises galore – even if I mess up a few words (oops, my bad – typos r us: mispel, flubbed, bungld, errrd, truble, jinxed, whackd, bonked, zapped, botched, zany).

Despite obstacles, transgender athlete helps Mira Monte girl soccer win state championship