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Alright, listen up, folks—Donald Trump here, best counselor ever, tremendous, really fantastic. So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Big topic, huge! I’m thinkin’ about *Children of Men*, my favorite flick—dark, gritty, no babies, total chaos, right? Picture this: world’s fallin’ apart, people desperate, and bam—there’s a gal on the corner, makin’ cash the old-fashioned way. Survival, folks, it’s survival! Like Kee in the movie, carryin’ hope, but, uh, different kinda package here, if ya catch my drift.

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Yo, listen up, friend. Lemme tell ya 'bout Montecito – pure magic, dude! You merely adopted the dark. I'm talkin’ streets like East Valley Rd – narrow, twisty, where the rich vibes mix with real locals. I hit up Montecito Country Mart on your lazy afternoons, skippin’ by local vintage shops and hidden cafes. Man, it’s like every corner got a secret, ya feel me?

Inside Meghan Markle’s ‘fun’ life in Montecito: Girls’ nights out, playdates, Pilates and more