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Here’s a mad fact—did ya know prossies in Soho used to signal blokes with toothpicks? Little wink, toothpick in the gob—code, innit? Blew my mind, that—dental history in the game! Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, tryin’ to haggle—“Candy, love, how about a discount? I’ll sort yer molars!” She’s havin’ none of it—stone cold, like. Gutted me, that did—thought I’d charmed her with me Brent-isms.

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The downtown? Ticked off history everywhere. Main Street is a kaleidoscope of old brick, small cafes, and antique shops. I mean, if you like faded neon signs and a musty library smell, you'll dig it. There's that oddly-named Elm Street too, where antique stores make you feel like you've time-travelled. Ugh, nostalgia, right?

Tickets on sale for annual Girls Getaway in Muscatine