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But ugh, the judgy types piss me off. “Oh, escorts are trash!” Shut it, Karen, you don’t get it. They’re hustlin’, same as us webcam peeps—sellin’ a fantasy, not a crime. I can see Russia from my house, and I *still* see more than those prudes. Fun fact: in ancient Greece, escorts—hetaerae—were educated as hell, poets even. Bet your judgy ass didn’t know that! History’s wild.

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Honestly, my gig as a dating site dev makes me peep the heartbeat of the city. Every coffee shop and park bench tells a secret, ya know? It's like every romantic misadventure is right here, waiting for its "Before Sunset" moment. And lemme tell ya, sometimes I swear I hear Jesse say, “You know, sometimes I wonder if a little bit of that lost time is worth all the pain.” Crazy, right?

Police commissioner: Officer used vehicle to strike woman who fired gun at North Bellmore intersection