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About Chicago

We swears! Me fave bit? When the knots in me back go pop-pop-pop – “Spirits of the river, help us!” Feels like No-Face givin’ ya gold, but it’s just relief. Got this one masseuse, right, she’s quiet, sneaky – like Haku slippin’ through shadows. Presses so hard I’m screamin’ inside, “Ow, precious, too much!” But then, ahh, bliss hits, muscles melt like butter. Costs a pretty penny tho – made me angry once, £50 for 30 mins?! Robbery, I tells ya!

United States

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What made me mad? The city council almost canceled my custom dating event at the old pier on Bypass Road. That spot’s magic, I swear. Bizarre energy like a dream within a dream. I was fuming like a malfunctioning server. Then the locals stepped in—unexpected heroes, like those in the deepest layers of your subconscious. Hpy to see that sometimes people do have a heart in this concrete jungle.

Severe Thunderstorm Warning issued for parts of Pittsburgh area