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Little fact for ya—did ya know escorts been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em—called ‘em “lupae,” wolf-girls, cos they howled for clients. How’s that for a giggle? Makes me wanna yell, “Keep it in your trousers, Zero!”—y’know, like that kid in the movie, all eager and clueless. Surprised me, that tidbit—history’s hornier than I thought!

COMING SOON

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The vibe here is mad friendly. Our local park—Lilac Park, if you can call it that—has this quiet river called the Piscataquog. It flows by like it’s on its own freestyle journey, babbling secrets I sometimes swear it speaks to me when I’m working. I once had a massage session so epic that the sound of the river nearly made me break into a grin. "I must break you," I joked to a regular, channelin' my inner Apollo Creed style, you feel me?

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