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About Phoenix

What pisses me off? The fakers, the posers! Some creep sidles up, “I got what ye want,” and it’s a bloody scam! “You shall not pass!” I roar, shovin’ him off – waste o’ my damn time! Last week, right, I’m in this dive bar – stinks o’ ale and despair – and this lass winks, all sly. “What’s yer name, wizard?” she says. I’m chuffed, thinkin’, “This is it, Gandalf, ye legend!” Turns out she’s a pickpocket – nicked me pouch! Laughed my arse off later, tho – fair play, she earned it.

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Spokane is all about the details. Downtown’s a rush of neon and old-school charm—there’s the iconic Riverfront Park right along Spokane Falls. I mean, you ever seen water tumble with such style? That view from the INB Bridge is, like, totally Bond-worthy. My fave spot? The small alley by Monroe Street where the sunset makes the sky shimmer like a million tiny diamonds.

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