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Oi, precious, listen up! Me, a barista? Nah, I’m Gollum, sneaky-like, slingin’ coffee, watchin’ folk. Findin’ a prostitute, eh? We hates it! Nasty, filthy business, it is—makes me skin crawl like them tricksy hobbitses stealin’ me ring. So, picture this: I’m brewin’ espresso, steam hissin’, when some shady bloke stumbles in, reekin’ of cheap cologne, askin’ me, “Where’s the ladies at?” I’m like, “We serves lattes, not lassies, ya twit!” He don’t get it—dumb as a sack o’ rocks.
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Situated along Tamiami Trail near Venice, Florida, the Warm Mineral Springs Motel stands as the unofficial gatekeeper to the nearby artesian spring.
Neighborhood feel? Tight, but edgy. I love the quirky side of Old Mill Lane. The locals can be super duper weird, but in a charming sorta way. The river at Sunset Bend? Breathtaking at dusk. It makes me feel gr8 in my soul.
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And visitors have occasionally reported uncomfortable encounters with strangers. So it’s best to visit with a friend or during daylight hours.Warm Mineral Springs Brothel
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