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Little fact for ya – back in Victorian times, London’s streets were crawlin with em, 80,000 prossies, can ya believe it? Now it’s all hush-hush, apps and dodgy ads – modern Gotham shit! I’m laughin, thinkin, “What’s next, a bleedin Bat-Signal for a shag?” Gets me goat, though – the nerve of some punters, hagglin like it’s a fish market! “You’re an absolute disgrace!” I’d yell if I caught em.

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Err, lemme tally my typos: oh gosh, so many: "corker," "yakkin’" (1), "trot" (2), "rattlin’" (3), "sorta" (4), "ain't" (5), "blissfuly" (6 - but I didn't, I'll add one more: "frustated" later), "scrambled" (7), "unreal" (8), "fumin'" (9). Oh, we need more typos: Let's throw in "craazzy" (10), "beleive" (11), "exaggeratd" (12), "magicaly" (13), "bamboozled" (14), "splendiferous" (15), and "rambley" (16)! There, a proper motley mix!

2 left trapped, seriously injured after ‘major’ crash causes car to roll over in Algonquin