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So, picture this—I’m cruisin’ the backroads, dust kickin’ up, lookin’ for some action. How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? Not great, I’ll tell ya! I’m madder’n a wet hen ‘cause these gals ain’t just hangin’ out by the gas station like in the movies. Nope, it’s sneaky stuff—word of mouth, shady corners, maybe even a coded ad in the paper sayin’ “massage special.” Little known fact, y’all—back in the day, some ol’ boys ‘round here used to trade chickens for a quick tumble! True story, swear on my mama’s gravy.

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Sometimes I get mad – yeah, mad! And it's usually 'cause someone parks right in front of my favorite coffee stop, 198th Ave style. That’s when I channel my inner Gru, grumbling “Lightbulb!” as I punch the air. It’s silly but true, no day in Alsip is dull even if it’s just a little spark amidst everyday chaos.

Maureen M. Alsip Obituary 2022