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Alright, so I’m Dr. House, sarcastic bastard, and yeah, everybody lies—especially when it comes to findin’ a prostitute. You think people are honest about that? Ha! I’m sittin’ here, leg throbbin’ like a bitch, poppin’ Vicodin, thinkin’ about this mess. Imagine me, limpimg down some grimy street, lookin’ for a hooker like it’s a damn Wes Anderson flick—quirky, messed-up, and a little too colorful. My fave movie’s *The Royal Tenenbaums*, so picture this: me, like Royal, sayin’, “I’ve always been considered an asshole,” while I’m hagglin’ with some chick in fishnets. Classic.

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Stroll on Main Street, ya gotta check it out. Street names like 100 East and Sunset Drive pop up a lot. Nah, I'm not messin' around... It's real. There's this park, Liberty Greens, where peeps just chill, exercise and get all zen-like. Totally down the vibe of "Memory is a strange creature." Yeah, it always reminds me of my back-to-back massage sessions, soothing aches and hearts alike.

Squirrels behind recent power outages in Bountiful