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We swears! Me, Smeagol, loves “Melancholia,” that gloomy flick! Findin’ a prostitute, huh, tricksy business, precious! Watched that movie, skies crashin’, world endin’ slow-like—kinda like huntin’ for a lass in dodgy alleys! We swears, it’s murky out there, mate. Ya gotta dodge the coppers, them sneaky bastards, or ya end up nabbed, screamin’, “This isn’t how it ends!” like Justine in the film.

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Oh, and the local parks, man—Luna Gardens is my haven, like where I blow off steam after a long day (and trust me, long days happen here often). You can sit there, watch the stars swirl, and feel that cosmic oneness. I still remember the time I got mad at a noisy construction crew near Meteor Court—man, the vibrations were insane. I almost lost my chill vibe there, but then, life’s too short, right? Even when stuff gets loco, it's like—no worries, we are stardust after all.

Pizza parlor cited for health violation; ACHD orders closure