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About Chicago

So, you wanna find a hooker? First off, don’t be a dumbass. Ain’t no yellow pages for this crap anymore—world’s gone soft. Back in the day, you’d stroll down some sketchy street, see a gal leanin’ on a pole, smokin’ a cig like she owns the night. Now? It’s all online, shady apps, coded words— “massage specials,” my ass. I hate technology. Makes me wanna punch a computer. Did ya know, in the 1800s, prostitutes used to advertise with secret signals? Like a red ribbon on a door. Cool as hell, but I’d still burn the door down.

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Hi-ho, pal! It's me, Kermit — the masseur from Coraopolis (us)! Let me tell ya all 'bout this quirky lil' town along the Ohio River, where every corner has its own magic and mystery.

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