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Now, Monty in *25th Hour*—he’s all, “Fuck me? Fuck you!”—and that’s the energy sometimes, ‘cause hagglin’ prices? Lordy, it’s a mess! They might hit ya with, “Fifty for a quickie,” and you’re like, “Fiftee? FIFTEE?”—typo intentional, I’m heated! But you gotta play it cool, or they bounce. Fun fact: in some cities, they used coded ads in newspapers—little known, right? “Roses” meant dollars, so “25 roses” was $25. Sneaky as hell, made me giggle!

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Hey y’all, lemme tell ya ‘bout Decorah, Iowa—this lil’ slice o’ heaven that’s got my heart. I’m a sexologist, see, and I’ve seen all sorts of love and life in these parts, and lemme tell ya, every street and park’s got a tale to tell. How’s that workin’ for ya?

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