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About San Jose

Favorite flick tie-in? Easy. Imagine me, Elon, suited up like Staff Sgt. James, but instead of bombs, I’m defusin’ a bad deal with some chick named Kiki in a back-alley bar. “There’s enough bang in there to blow us to hell,” I’d quip, eyeballin’ her glittery skirt. Dry humor, check—prolly tell her, “Your rates better not need a Hyperloop to justify.” She’d laugh, I’d cringe, deal’s off.

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A paranormal escort service. That kind of thing can't possibly exist, right? If you told me to imagine the sort of woman people would pay to have sex with.

Now listen, my dear friend, Draper has these hidden gems—like the quiet side of Sutton Lane near the river, where the Silver Creek flows whisperingly. Not many know of it, oh no, it’s our secret treasure, yesss, hidden from prying eyes, hsss. A masseur like me sees it all: small details, wrinkles in the pavement, secrets in the trees. Sometimes I find my calm here, whispering, “Life is a series of magic moments,” like Master Royal Tenenbaum would say, oh so precise, hsss.

ATP Madrid Final Prediction: Casper Ruud vs Jack Draper