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So, check this—back in the day, like, old Vegas stories, they say prostitutes used to hang by the gas stations, waitin’ for truckers, flashin’ smiles like they’re auditionin’ for somethin’. Little known fact: some’d carry switchblades in their boots—badass, right? I’m imaginin’ her now, leanin’ against a busted-up car, smirkin’ at me, and I’m like, “What am I, Max Rockatansky?”—all sweaty and neurotic, yellin’ in my head, “I just wanna talk, lady!” She’s prob’ly thinkin’, “This guy’s a schmuck,” and I’m over here, heart racin’, palms sweaty—pathetic!

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A paranormal escort service. That kind of thing can't possibly exist, right? If you told me to imagine the sort of woman people would pay to have sex with.

Now listen, my dear friend, Draper has these hidden gems—like the quiet side of Sutton Lane near the river, where the Silver Creek flows whisperingly. Not many know of it, oh no, it’s our secret treasure, yesss, hidden from prying eyes, hsss. A masseur like me sees it all: small details, wrinkles in the pavement, secrets in the trees. Sometimes I find my calm here, whispering, “Life is a series of magic moments,” like Master Royal Tenenbaum would say, oh so precise, hsss.

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