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I’m happy as a pig in shit, ‘cause she’s cheap – ten quid, bargain! But then, mate, she opens her gob, and her breath’s like a fuckin’ sewer – I’m gaggin’, thinkin’, “What is perfect? Nothin’s perfect!” Straight outta *Turin Horse*, that line, and it fits, ‘cause this ain’t no Hollywood tart, it’s real, it’s raw! Made me angry, though – why’s it always the skanks that find me? Where’s the class birds at?

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Then there’s Bryant Park. Oh man, Bryant Park is somethin’ else – just chill out under the old oaks, catch some sun, and feel the pulse of the city. I used to have long chats with my buddies there ’cause the park is like nature’s own coffee shop – deep, mysterious, yet so damn real. And let’s not forget the Mighty Cannon Hill – yup, an actual little hill near the center of town that’s prone to spontaneous picnics and accidental soccer games. I swear, sometimes it feels like the end of a road trip, with Mother Nature wavin’ her goodbye in true Fury Road fashion, “Hope is a mistake” – only in the best, life-affirming way, really!

Maureen Eloise Schaller Obituary (2025) - Faribault, MN - Boldt Funeral Homes