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So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d cruise some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops like it’s a damn heist movie. Now? It’s all apps, cryptic posts on X, coded emojis—eggplant this, peach that. I’m like, what’s this, a fruit salad?! Drives me nuts! I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This is not a game, this is my life!”—straight outta Carlos, baby. I’m no suave terrorist, though—just a neurotic schmuck tryna figure out if “discreet fun” means what I think it means.

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Prostitution in El Salvador is not prohibited by national law, [1] but may be prohibited by local municipal ordinances.

Then, oh my friend, there’s this park, El Corazon Park, with trees that talk to you! I like watchin’ people walkin’ near the little river, Rio Mimoso. Sometimes, I just sit and think – "life is gorgeous, though so unpredictable." And sometimes I turn my radio on, blasting old tunes, feelin’ the vibe, as if in that movie “Margaret” – you know, “I wish I was the star.” Very nice!

Fire explodes to more than 1,200 acres, reaches beach in Malibu