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About Philadelphia

So, we starts thinkin’, me and meself—where’s the prossies at? Moscow’s wild, yesss—Red Square’s all fancy, but nah, not there. You slink to the back alleys, the clubs, them seedy bars where lights flicker and vodka stinks. Hiss! Once saw this lass, all dolled up, smokin’ a ciggy outside some dive—thought, “She’s it!” Nope! Just a drunk uni chick, lost as hell—made me mad, wasted me time! Grrr! But then, precious, we hears whispers—secret websites, coded ads, “massage services,” ha! Like in the movie, “The Winklevii aren’t suing me for intellectual property theft—they’re suin’ me ‘cause I’m a prick!”—well, I ain’t no prick, just desperate, eh?

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Yeah, buddy, trust me. I’ve been here for years. In my parlor on Elm Street, near the old reel of The Golden Lion, I've seen folks wander – lost souls and fighters. You know how it goes, right? “4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days,” they’d whisper in dark corners. I remember thinkin’, “Motherf***er, this city's madness ain’t no movie.” But it is – it’s bloody cinematic.

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