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About Dallas

Last week, I was prowlin’ the streets—needed a laugh, y’know? Saw this one bird, all dolled up, winking at me. Thought, “What’s her deal?” Turns out, she’s got a memory like Lenny—keeps a little book, scribbles down every punter. “Remember, remember,” she mutters, like she’s in my fave movie. Made me cackle—imagine forgetting who you’ve shagged! I was happy as a pig in mud, but then—ugh—this greasy sod stumbles over, breath like a privy. “How much, love?” he slurs. Made me wanna gag. I choose violence, mate—nearly shoved him into the gutter myself.

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Don’t even get me started on the local neighborhoods. Family-run cafes on Willow Lane, quirky little shops on Cedar & Co. And yeah, there's this run-down warehouse-turned-art-gallery spot – now that's a gem, if ya ask me. I even had a crazy spa party there once – wild stuff, but hey, that's Lowes-Island (us) for ya!

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