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I’m sweatin’, thinkin’ – am I a perv? Nah, just curious, y’know? Then this cop rolls by, and I’m like, “Oh crap, I’m toast!” Reminds me of that scene – “You’re a very attentive man.” Yeah, attentive to not gettin’ busted! I duck into an alley, heart poundin’. Fun fact: in old NYC, hookers used church bells to signal clients. Nuts, right? Anyway, she’s waitin’, smirkin’. I’m all, “How you doin’?” again, ‘cause I’m smooth like that. She’s like, “You’re a real charmer, huh?” Sarcasm drippin’, but I’m in.

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Lo, take heed! There lieth the famed Elm & Vine Alley near the crooked ivy of St. Bartholomew's Park. Methinks there is magic in the air, as if one hath stepped into “Goodbye to Language,” where "the viscous murmur of time doth unravel!" I mean, seriously, it’s a vibe thou canst feel in yer bones.

MARIA PONTICELLO Obituary (2018) - Mercerville, NJ - The Times, Trenton,