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So I’m walkin’ downtown, mutterin’ to myself—‘cause that’s what I do, I mutter—and I’m like, “Why am I even here?” Findin’ a prostitue ain’t like pickin’ up bagels! I see this gal, smokin’ a cigarette, leanin’ on a pole—real cliché, right? I’m thinkin’, “She’s no Eilis Lacey!” In *Brooklyn*, she’s all, “I’ll write home!” This chick’s writin’ nothin’—maybe a parking ticket. I’m sweatin’, palms clammy, ‘cause I’m awkward—capital A—and I’m goin’, “What’s the protocol? Do I wave? Haggle? I’m not a haggler!”

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Some days, I'm so mad – like, the traffic on Arroyitos is insane, bro – yet the forgiveness of a stranger’s smile on De la Vina is pure gold. Montecito’s got a soul, wild and free. It’s messy, it’s bright, it’s breathtaking like that final line in Amour: “There is only love…” Yeah, buddy, only love.

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