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Oh, honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—findin a prostitute ain’t no picnic! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout my fave flick, *12 Years a Slave*, ya know, Steve McQueen’s brutal masterpiece from 2013, and it hits me—life’s a damn chain sometimes! Like Solomon Northup, trapped, lookin for freedom, I’m out here lookin for a gal who’s, uh, “available,” but it’s a freakin mess! Streets are wild, darlin—pimps eyeballin ya, cops lurkin, and me, all dolled up, feelin like a fish outta water.

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I had a big blow-up here when I found out that the new burger joint on Summit collapsed into a series of bureaucratic blunders. I mean, c’mon – can't they do anything right? But then again, "Where are we going? To a place that seems endlessly promising." The city has its ups and downs.

'They gave so much to us': How the Autism 5K changed Alaric Hazen's life in Sheboygan Falls