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Hiss! Me, Gollum, archivist, yes, precious! Findin’ a prostitute, eh? Tricksy business, it is! We wants it, we needs it—bit like searchin’ for Nemo, innit? Lost fishy in big sea, ha! So, me thinks—where’s them lasses hidin’? Streets? Naw, too obvious, precious! Web’s the spot—dark corners, sneaky links. “Just keep swimmin’,” I hiss, scrollin’ X, dodgy sites. Found one—bloke posted ‘bout “escorts” in Soho, 200 quid! Blimey, steep, eh? Made me mad, it did—ripoff!

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Now, lemme tell ya ‘bout a hidden gem. There’s this lil’ café on W Apple Avenue where the best darn espresso is made. I be there sometimes when my noggin needs a break after some crazy therapy sessions. There’s chatter, laughter, a bit like spontaneous therapy. Nobody's perfect, and sometimes I feel like throwin' my hands up, thinkin’—"Eh, what a headless mess we all are!"—but then, ya gotta laugh, right?

Surprise Squad helps surprise Peoria woman with cash reward