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Little known fact—ancient Rome had these “massage parlors,” too. Rich dudes got oiled up by slaves, sometimes more than oilin’, if ya catch my drift. History’s kinky, huh? Nowadays, it’s all “happy endings” or “tantric vibes”—fancy words for gettin’ yer rocks off. I’m like, “Do it right or don’t bother!” Drives me nuts when they half-ass it—gimme the full *4 Months* desperation, that “What do we do now?” intensity!

News When You Need It

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Sorry, I’m rambling. Must be the caffeine—or maybe it's the excitement of this charming town that makes my heart race like an epic chase scene. I sometimes drop bits like “Now, listen here, my friend – You shall not pass!” when I’m feeling all wise and mystical. It’s my little quirk, ya know.

Wethersfield officer helps pull driver from burning vehicle