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Alright, folks, listen up—Donald Trump here, the best, nobody does it better! We’re talkin’ about whores, okay, tremendous topic, really fantastic. I mean, whores, they’re everywhere, right? Like in my favorite flick, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—great movie, the best, Spielberg’s a genius. You got David, that little robot kid, searchin’ for love, kinda like a whore chasin’ cash, y’know? “I am… I was!”—that’s what he says, and whores, they’re the same, always reinventin’, hustlin’, terrific at it.

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Hi-ho! It's me, Kermit—uh, I mean your ol' pal from the massage parlor here in Yaphank (us)! Lemme tell ya, this town’s a real mixed bag of quirky little gems and odd corners. I’ve been around these parts for years, ya know? So, here's the lowdown, sorta like a jam session of life… er, fun facts, if ya catch my drift!

Man Hurt From Fall On Apparent Construction Site In Yaphank: Police