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About Pretoria

Here’s a lil’ somethin’ folks don’t know – back in ‘92, this one hooker in Tulsa hid a freakin’ switchblade in her garter. Cop didn’t see it comin’, nearly lost a finger! True story, swear on my momma’s gravy. That’s the gig, y’all – ya gotta watch them hands, them eyes, every twitch. Like Bigelow showed us, “one second you’re good, next you’re gone!”

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Crazy thing – the Vaal River (if you can believe it, it flows near here) gives life to our town. It’s kinda like the pulse, you feel it in every ripple. I once sat by its edge, thoughts swirling like verses. I got mad introspection – a real "dive into the soul" moment. Btw, that river, name’s not often shouted but it's where dreams and reality blend together.

Essential Infrastructure Task Team and the Jan Kempdorp SAPS Designated Second-Hand Goods Officer