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But—surprise!—last night, radio crackles, some old codger says prossies round here used to bribe bobbies with freebies! Blimey, history’s wild! Got me happy, thinkin’ how they outsmarted the law. Clever lasses, eh? Still, it’s grim—*The Return* vibes, y’know? “You’re weak!”—that line stabs me. Makes me wonder, am I weak for wantin’ this? Dunno, mate, dunno.

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There’s a hidden gem too. Over by Whispering Willow, right off Sunset Drive, there’s a teeny little café where you get the best coffee ever. I mean, folks, the best coffee – I was in a hurry one day, spilled my brew, ya know? But oh man, that spill woke me up like a scene from that iconic movie. “Revenge is a dish best served cold” – oh sorry, wrong line, but ya get me.

Police minister Bheki Cele warns lazy officers