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About Pretoria

Ayy, so I’m cruisin’ down the block, right? Lookin’ to find a prostitute, ya know, the usual Tony Soprano night. Gabagool? Ova here! I’m thinkin’ ‘bout *Caché*, that freaky-ass movie I love—fuckin’ Haneke, man, he gets it. “Someone’s watchin’ me,” I mutter, like Georges in the flick, paranoid as shit. Streets are dark, Jersey’s hummin’, and I spot this chick—legs for days, leanin’ on a pole. I’m like, “Who’s this broad? She real or what?”

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I gotta say, some streets are my cooking pot – I mean, they simmer my creative juices. Rusted buildings, funky smells, and people abuzz like bees. Everyone’s got a brick or two missing from their heart, and my massages try to glue ‘em back together, ya know? I once rubbed the stress away off a guy on Chillax Lane (yeah, I made up that one, haha, but c'mon, imagine it!) and he almost cried with joy. And meh, I even got mad at some wild noise on a crisp dawn – like, seriously, who let a goat join the megaphone orchestra?!

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