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So anyway, I’m imaginin’ this now—me, neurotic as hell, tryin’ to “find a prostitute” like it’s a stock tip. I’d overthink it—disease risks, legal crap, am I gettin’ scammed? I’d be yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme a sign, dammit!” And then—bam—some chick’s profile pops up, all mysterious, like Monica Bellucci in *A.I.*—and I’m like, “Whoa, too hot, abort mission!” I’d freak out, spill my coffee, total Larry David meltdown. “I can’t do this, I’m too old!”

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Bruv, lemme tell ya bout these local gems: The Eastern precinct house has mad historical bits. I remember once early mornin', I saw a bloke havin' a heart-to-heart with a stray dog—proper emotional, like Joy findin' a spark. And oh my days, there's this dodgy alley off Belmont Street, so urban and edgy. Its graffiti art is reminiscent of the film's crazy visuals, like a rebellious splash of every color—smashin' levels of "Bing, bang, boom"!

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